March Madness

The best thing about digital pictures, is that you can take as many pictures as you would like since it is easy to view and then just choose the best ones.  Consequently, hardly ever do you see a Facebook picture or a blog picture that isn't worthy of sharing.  I am guilty of this very thing...presenting the put together or picture perfect presentation of things.  But, truth be told...our March was the TRUE March Madness.  

So this was technically the very end of February, but just before Holland was born my good friend, Cheslea, came to take maternity pictures of me and the kids.  

Picture #1, I posted on Facebook and may print.  Picture #2, it was bitter cold and super windy and               Chelsea and I were freezing the entire time we were outside.  We had watery eyes and were shivering between shots.  

This is the super cute picture Chelsea captured of the four of us...  this is what was really going on during the photo shoot...

Then Holland was born, and Jordan got another sweet baby girl.  Here is the first picture of him showing off a fresh new baby (note the TV on in the back ground).  Then the second picture, he is clearly over the baby and into the TV show, as they are "snuggling" and she is screaming her new born head off.

Then the kids came to the hospital to meet Holland.  Here is a cute picture of Silas giving her a sweet smile.  Then the rest of the story, the kids were going buck wild in the hospital room, that is Trey jumping on pillow on the pull out bed.

Then we have a semi-decent first family photo...

 Oh, just kidding, that wasn't the first picture, it was one of about 15 takes where someone is taking the opportunity of the grown ups looking at the camera to grab someone, poke a sibling, see exactly what happens when you touch a baby's eye ball, or make the strangest face they can think of to make.

 Remarkably, Chelsea was willing to come back and take more pictures after Holland was born.  I love this one of all the kids together.

I especially love it because it was the ONLY split second when they were acting somewhat human.  

 Here, Trey is clearly scared of being touched by the baby and I am sure Silas is lecturing him on sitting still and Jewel is totally oblivious, sneaking in a head kiss.

Chelsea got this one, truly perfection, of Jordan and Holland.  When it was not Jordan's turn to be in a picture.  He was wrestling the kids around, throwing them onto the bed, and getting them as wound up as possible.  

Here is Holland's angel face...followed by her "Leave me alone and let me take a stinking nap!" face. Guess which one I posted :)

Mother and daughter, bonded and enjoying each other...except for when I was firmly whispering to her that she needed to get her act together and quit the fussing (all while pretending like I was sweetly shushing her).

Then we took a 3 generation picture with all the girls, only after we took one with Trey in it since he refused to get off my lap.  He didn't want to be in a single picture of the shoot, except the one he wasn't supposed to be in.

 The wedding rings, the hands of the mother and father wrapped around the baby and intertwined...

Only after the baby had stopped screaming and trying to get her gas out.

I also posted this, describing it as the boys making a pact to protect Holland

 Doesn't she look safe and sound here as Trey attempts to put Silas in a head lock and take him down...

 Beppe helped a TREMENDOUS amount while she was with us, and totally got in on the March Madness.  Her is a picture of her giving Holland a bath in the sink, a photo that is a tradition to take as my mom gave sink baths to all of us and to all of her grandkids.

 Then she had to finish bath time with Jewel "helping".  This means that Jewel does all she can to totally take over and do it her way.

It was almost Beppe's birthday while she was here.  We made angel food cake with strawberries and whipped cream and sprinkles.  Then we put these cute decorations on and sang to her with candles and all.  What I don't have is a picture of is the part when I was walking through the kitchen with the cake in one hand and the camera (on video as we were singing) in the other and the flame from the candle lit the little paper flags on fire and I nearly torched my hair before setting a burning cake down  in front of her while she was holding my infant and my older kids began all blowing on it at once, shooting pieces of the burning paper all over the table.

 The day my mom left, Grammy and Pops flew in to take a turn in March Madness.  Here is a darling picture of Grammy and Jewel having a tea party.

 Trey was invited to join us, he proceeded to scarf his dainty snack and climb on to the table to find where the whipped cream was coming from.  Of course when he found it he went right to town scooping it directly out of it's fancy little cup and into his mouth.

 Another seemingly sweet kiss from big brother to baby sister, followed by the most sinister and snickery grin you have ever seen, missing teeth and all.

 And a few more major madness moments... This is me giving Holland her first bath.  She is screaming because it is a cold and windy day and our kitchen window is not even close to being sealed so it is FREEZING in the kitchen.  And then the kids were helping Beppe with some cooking project, they were all covered with pureed fruit trying to stir all at the same time and by the looks of it, Trey is ticked that someone told him to stop eating all of it off of his spoon.

Grandpa did a lot of snuggling and singing, but this...this is Grandpa on babysitting duty for Jewel.  That is her baby doll in his arms, she was serious about him taking care of the baby.  Later, when Beppe asked him to take Holland while we got dinner ready, she was totally put out that Grandpa put her doll down to take Holland and gave Beppe the true stink eye.

 Grammy reads about a thousand stories a day to the kids.  They snuggle with her and listen intently, unless I come in with the camera.  Then Trey takes off, Jewel refuses to put her legs down and effectively shows the world her underwear through her tights, and Silas starts flipping his wig and flopping around.

To be fair, we also had a lot of genuine amazing March moments as well.  There was a lot of precious times getting to know Holland and enjoying the relationships of everyone who came to visit.  

However, the maddest March moment?  I posted several of these cute pictures of Trey snuggling with Holland on our bed.  I loved each one and in the moment Jordan and I were literally on the verge of tears as we tried to absorb all the cuteness.

 Then we realized Trey had come into our bed that night because he didn't feel good.  He had a fever and was beginning to cough and get stuffy.  After all that sweet snuggling, he infected is darling baby sister with a cold that turned to RSV.  So, after Holland was born, Beppe came and Grandpa came and Great Pake and Great Beppe came, and then Grammy and Pops came, and then Jordan took two weeks off of work for paternity leave, and then on the Friday before Jordan was scheduled to go back to work and we were scheduled to start really doing life with four kids, Holland was admitted to the hospital and stayed for nearly a week.  Jordan had to take more time off and keep the three older kids by himself while I was in hospital lock down with Holland.

 So, how is life with four kids?  Madness I tell you, March Madness.  We are thrilled to welcome the month of April.

The final four-th :)

This was me, two days before Holland was born.  I am reminded this afternoon of 2 Peter 3:8...

But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.

Every day of the last month of the pregnancy was a day that lasted a thousand years.  And every day of the first month of her life has flown by like a thousand years in just a moment (quite literally it has felt like one continuous day with a few short naps here and there).

No matter how I tried to talk myself out of getting the end of pregnancy crazies, I just couldn't stop it.  At 34 weeks I was 2 cm dilated, and I progressed approximately a centimeter a week until I camped out at 6 cm from weeks 37-38.  At my 38 week check, my doctor offered to strip my membranes at week 39 and then started asking me what I wanted to do if I still hadn't gone into labor.  Did I want to induce?  

My mom arrived that Monday.  For two full days we packed in all the preparation and fun activity that we could with all three kids.  We hit Costco, Target, the park, pedicures, house cleaning, and coffee time galore all in one crazy swoop.  On Wednesday morning I went back to the doctor, still at 6 cm, he stripped the membranes and sent me on my way.  I called my mom as I left the office.  She encouraged me to take the day alone.  She told me to come home for dinner, but to have a final morning and afternoon all to myself, since it could be my last for a long, long, long time.  So, I ran a few quick errands and then went to the park.  

It was a cool day, but nice sun breaks and no wind.  I grabbed my phone, equipped with a sermon from my brother that I had been waiting to listen to, and started walking.  It felt so good to get the fresh air, get into a good walking groove, and just release the tension.  I listened to the sermon, and then just let my mind and heart turn to conversation with God.  I walked for almost 3 hours. 

I went home, we had dinner, we put the kids to bed, I went to bed.  I was discouraged.  Stripped membranes and 3 hours of walking and my contractions were the same as they had been all the other nights of the past 2 weeks.  And then I woke up.  

It was 11:30.  I was in the middle of a super hard contraction.  I knew I had a choice.  I can try to go back to sleep and attempt a "Trey-like" delivery where I wake up and rush to the hospital (also risking going back to sleep and labor stopping), or I can get up and help this baby get moving and keep track of what is going on.  I chose option 2, got up and took a long, hot shower.  I didn't want to wake anyone in the house, so I put on my shoes and jacket and went outside.  It was the midnight version of my day time walk.  The moon was bright, the air was crisp, and my phone was ready with another sermon and a play list of worship music.  I walked, listened to Shad speak beautifully about Humility, and prayed.  Then I started my worship music and sang my heart out.  I was having some hard contractions, but they were inconsistent.  Ten minutes apart, then 3 minutes but not as hard, then 20 minutes.  I just kept walking and singing and praying and timing.

At 2:30 am I went inside for a snack and some water.  My mom came down to go to the bathroom.  She asked for an update, and we stood in the kitchen, feeling Holland pushing, rolling, stretching, kicking and doing everything she could from her end to help me out.  Mom offered to walk with me for a while.  So we both bundled up and set out.  We talked about when she was in labor with her kids, the deliveries she had, how dad was involved, the doctors she had, and how she felt during all of the leading up to the baby being born.  By the end of our walk my contractions were closer together and moving from my abdomen to my lower back.  She urged me to get Jordan and get to the hospital.  I was very reluctant.  I did not want to get there, have things slow down, and have to be stuck in bed for hours waiting for the baby to come while I am hooked up to the monitors.  I wanted to walk, to feel everything, to know...to be in control.  Also, I was being taunted by the week before when I had gone in to the hospital at 2 am and made Lisa come and get my kids, only to be sent home in false labor.  But, mothers know best, they truly do.  I got Jordan up and with hugs and kisses from my mom, we went.  I refused to go straight to the hospital.  We drove around for a while, got Jordan breakfast at 4 am at Jack in the Box, and kept timing contractions.  All of a sudden they started to get serious, 10 minutes, 8 minutes, 6 minutes, 4 minutes...we drove back to the hospital.  

When we checked in at 4:45 the nurse came in to see my progress.  I was 7 cm.  Although I was surprised that I wasn't an 8 or a 9, I could feel that my contractions were coming faster and that things were going to be intense soon.  They moved us to a delivery room and let me stand next to the bed while the nurse hooked me up to the monitor.  I was hoping to get hooked up and then get put on a mobile unit so I could keep walking.  At 5:05 am, my water broke.  Instantly the contractions intensified and began coming one right after the other.  The nurse was encouraging me to breathe through them she continued to work to get me hooked up.  Almost right away I started feeling like I needed to push.  Another check showed I was at 9.5 cm, so she reminded me to hold off on pushing until I was fully dilated...then she started paging the doctor.  

When the midwife came in, I was fully immersed in severe contractions.  The monitor started showing that the baby was in distress and the doctor and nurse asked me to get on the bed and lay on my side.  Jordan helped me, but I was so ready to push I couldn't get onto my side.  Due to the baby's dropping heart rate, the doctor instructed me to go ahead and start pushing.  

One very long and very tough push and she was out.  The chord had been wrapped around her neck and she was completely blue and silent.  They placed her on my chest and her arm flopped over against me, lifeless.  All of a sudden there were three nurses next to me, rubbing, flicking toes, encouraging her to breathe.  

Finally she began to cough, sputter and eventually cry.  We kept rubbing and talking to our little Holland girl.  She squirmed and stretched and nuzzled and found her fist.  I was experiencing all that I had been feeling during the pregnancy... without the visual barrier.  I smiled at her and snuggled her right back, feeling like we already knew each other.  

Physically, the post delivery was excruciating.  Getting out of the delivery room and into our recovery room was like being evacuated from a natural disaster.  It was the first time I got a chance to really look at her, take a few deep breaths myself, and that Jordan and I got a moment to process everything.  

At the beginning of the pregnancy I remember wondering what it would be like on the fourth time...would I just be used to it, expecting things, unimpressed?  Instead, I feel like there was an even deeper awareness of the miracle of life.  There was a desire to savor each moment even more.  An ability to be less concerned with my physical self and more enthralled by the baby.  

We spent that afternoon filling everyone in on details, seeing the big kids, and going through all the checks and monitors with the doctors and nurses.  By the next day, we were ready to rest and recover.  Jordan had to stop at the office and then went to the house to help my mom with the kids.  I stayed off my computer, off my phone, and plugged in to resting and snuggling.  The nurses gave me the benefit of the doubt with caring for her, knowing it was our fourth and that she was at such a healthy weight.  They really let us be as often as they could.  My mom came at lunch time to hang out with Holland while I showered and ate.  We didn't even talk very much, just admired her and experienced the miraculous gift of three generations of girls in the room.  The day was beautiful and sunny, light filled the room and I hummed worship songs to her.  The extra day of being in bed tremendously helped me in getting back on my feet faster.  I will remember and treasure the sweetness of that day every time I think of her birthday. 

Holland surprised me with such light hair and such a beautiful complexion and color.  She was about the size I suspected her to be, and if I would have had to put money down on a gender I would have picked a girl :)  Jewel was beyond thrilled to have a baby sister, and the boys immediately felt a tenderness and concern for her.  

Little Holland Pearl, you are greatly loved, treasured and celebrated.  You are the sweetest little cherry on top of our little family.  Thank you, Lord for all of your provision and protection and intention in her arrival.  We are blessed.

Holland Pearl Bury

Dr. Gary Hoffman, my OB, coming to visit us after she was born.  A fantastic doctor with whom I was greatly blessed through the three pregnancies.

 After her first bath, getting her hair wrapped in a towel :)
Then getting to snuggle with Dad for the first time.

 My first photo with my baby doll.

 Trey is totally enamored with her.  I worried he would want to be with me and not care about her, oppositely he wanted to hold her the entire time and got mad when the other kids got a turn.

Jewel and Holland, sisters at last.

 Silas waited until it was almost time to go, saying he didn't want to hold her right now, before he finally climbed up next to me and asked to have a turn.  He got a gentle smile on his face and talked quietly and sweetly to her.  He reminded me that she knew his voice from when he would talk to her when I was pregnant with her.  The protective big brother bond was begun.

Working hard to get a thumb free!

 Dad and Beppe taking turns checking her out and getting to know her while she works on getting to know them.

 Our first family photo.  Proud mom and dad.

This is just simply to remember the major life and spunk that this kid has and the incredible amount of fun that he brings to our family.

Trey Boxing With Jordan

(click the link to see the youtube video)

Unique Expressions

This past year I have watched Jewel begin to explore her interactions with God.  It has been such an incredible blessing to see the unique expressions of who God is, through the relationships he is building with my kids.

I remember one time when I was a child, I overheard my mom sharing with her Bible study group that I had left a note on her dresser that week that she was sure was God's word to her.  The note simply said "I am doing this because I love you."  I actually remember writing the note.  I was just feeling overwhelmed with appreciation for my mom and I wanted her to know.  I wanted her understand how wonderful I thought she was.  I decided writing it would be more special.  So as I grabbed a scrap of paper and sat down to write, I just remember feeling like the whole purpose of the note was because I love her...so that was exactly what I wrote.  I don't remember the difficult situation that she was dealing with, or why the timing was so important to her, but as she shared that with the group I remember feeling so honored (and humbled in a totally surprised way) that God had used me to speak to her.  Jewel frequently plays this role in my life.

Several months ago we were sitting around the dinner table.  I had a very long day with the kids and I was just wrestling with myself in my heart over regular life issues.  As we were finishing up I told Jordan I really wanted to go for a walk after dinner.  He asked if we should all go for a family walk.  I hesitantly responded that I felt like I just needed a walk by myself and would it be OK for him to hang out with the kids for a while so I could do that.  He was obviously a little taken aback and curious as to what would be making me feel that way, but of course agreed to help me get some alone time.  Jewel got up from her seat and stood between us.

"Mom, do you need some alone time on your walk?"
I nodded.
"Do you just need to go for a walk with Jesus?"
I nodded again, feeling my eyes start to burn with tears.

Jordan looked at her, "How did you know that?" he asked.

She looked right into my eyes, put her hand on my leg, and with a sweetness and gentleness she said,
"Because I love her."

I hugged her, told her I loved her, too, and wiped the tears from my eyes.  It completely changed my attitude going into my walk.  Instead of feeling like I needed to pursue God and seek after him, I felt like he was also looking forward to our time together, he was anticipating our interaction, he wanted to be with me, he loved me.

Often at bed time Jewel and I sing songs.  We also talk, pray and do A LOT of snuggling.  Recently she has been wanting to sing songs to me.  She doesn't usually remember the lyrics to the songs that she likes on the spot, so instead of trying to clamor through a song we know, she sings something she makes up.  There is little about the song that is "in tune" or that even makes sense, but when she is done she always tells me that God put that song in her heart.  I know she is worshiping through her singing.  It makes it beautiful.

A couple nights ago we were snuggled up (and by snuggled up, let me explain that I lay next to her in bed and she presses her entire body against my side, must lay her head in the crook of my arm, wraps both her arms around me and her legs over top of me...there is literally not one centimeter of our skin that is not stuck to one another...then she rubs my arm or tries to scratch my back while we whisper to each other) and getting ready to sing.  She wanted to sing to me.  We had an eventful day because she had a crown put on her tooth and it had been traumatic and painful.  She waited for a moment before she began her song and then also told me that she would be using some of the "spanish language" in her words.  I was interested what Spanish she knew or thought she knew.  She started singing a song about how she is going to do everything I do, and she sees me when I pray, and she is going to do what she sees me do...over and over she sang the same lyrics with passion and emotion.  As I listened I so clearly felt God telling me that I was modeling for her how to handle her difficulties.  She is watching me when I struggle and emulating my responses.  She sees when I am pressed and when I choose him and choose prayer.  In her hard day at the dentist, she was remembering what it looks like to choose God instead of fear.  She was watching when I didn't do that, when I had chosen to react or freak out instead.  She is doing what she sees me doing.  And, as only God can do, I felt convicted for my sins, honored for the position of being her mother, and humbled by the gift of leading her towards Jesus...all at the same time.  When she was done, my heart was just thumping in my chest.  She asked if I liked the song and what did I think of the spanish language.  I complimented her, and thought to myself, if by Spanish Language you mean Holy Spirit Language...yes, I heard that loud and clear.

 I am so thankful for the way that God speaks specifically and intentionally to her heart, revealing the parts of himself that he designed her to relate to and connect with.  I pray that she continues to fall more and more in love with him, deeper and deeper into friendship with him, know more and more about him, and give more and more of his love to those around her.

Soundtrack

If I could choose a soundtrack for my last post...this would be it.  My precious girl, worshipping in dance, to one of my very favorite groups, Selah, singing one of my very favorite songs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4IQoWrAWvg

*try to ignore the toy guns and the diaper on the floor.  The diaper is clean (Trey stills wears them at bed time), and the guns are from an earlier stuffed animal hunt we had.

Provisions

In the last month I have been attending a Bible study by Priscilla Shirer on the story of Gideon.  From the beginning to now, I have struggled with knowing how to handle Gideon.  The study highlights Gideon's insecurity, lack of faith and vision, and the doubt that he fights as he takes his maiden voyage in obedience to God.  On one hand I identify so much with Gideon.  There is a lot of second guessing, wondering and justifying that happens in my life.  On the other hand I am frustrated with Gideon (and consequently, myself) that he doesn't see God and fall in love with him in a way that leads to abandonment and joy in following.  

This last week we read about and discussed Gideon laying out the fleeces before the Lord (Judges 6:36-40).  Again I was so torn.  Gideon was humbly approaching the throne and asking for confirmation, I don't know that I would have the strength to do that.  He asked twice for nature defying miracles.  God comes through both times, without a verbal response to Gideon he just displays his power.  

Shirer reports that Gideon was a follower of Baal prior to the Angel of the Lord appearing to him.  His requests to God concerning the fleece are reflective of his indoctrination of Baal.  In particular when Gideon asks God to allow the fleece to be wet and the ground dry, he may have thought back to his days of Baal and the logical and scientific fact that perhaps the fleece had actually soaked up all the water around it (causing it to be soaking wet and the ground to be totally dry).  Of course we can only place thoughts and feelings onto Gideon, guessing what he may have been going through and of course our own circumstances and personalities play into what we assign to Gideon.  So, he asks for something that would seem even more miraculous the second time.  Again God displays his power for Gideon, this time leaving the fleece completely dry and the ground soaked with dew.  We have no idea how Gideon felt after that, in his heart.  Was he satisfied? Amazed? Filled?  Still questioning?  Still trying to explain how it happened?  We don't know. 

What we do know is how God continued to interact with him.  From there, God tells Gideon that his practical resources are too great.  In order for God to give the Midianites into his hand, he will first dwindle his army of 32,000 into 300.  God did not want Gideon feeling like there was a way to explain away the miracle of this victory.  Then, in middle of the night, God comes to Gideon and asks him to take his servant and go down to the Midianite camp.  God leads Gideon and Purah (his servant) to the tent of the enemy where two of the enemy soldiers are confiding in one another about a dream.  The first soldier explains his dream to the second soldier.  Without hesitating, the second soldier replies, "This can be nothing other than the sword of Gideon.  God has given the Midianites and the whole camp into his hands."

And then we do know how Gideon responds.  He falls on his knees and begins to worship the Lord.  He goes back to his camp and leads his army into battle.  He follows the instructions the Lord provides.  He watches the Midianite army turn on itself in fear.  Without a single raised sword, without any lost lives or any injuries, the Lord delivers the entire camp into Gideon's hands.  

In the last week, I have had Gideon-like interactions with God.  October first the government shut down.  It was Jordan's first day working his new position at work.  His hours dramatically increased and his pay was halted.  Brought right to the front of our eyes was our weakness in financial planning.  We have never wanted to be the type to live paycheck to paycheck.  We had fooled ourselves into thinking that we were doing our best with what we had financially.  We were placing way more emphasis on our security in a government job, never seeing a government shut down as a possibility.  We were always thankful to God for the job, but we also relied on the practical part of paycheck predictability.  

We knew his hours would be increased.  We didn't anticipate a full week of not having dinner together and even nights where he got home after we were in bed and left again before we were up.  That saying "dance like no one is watching, love like you've never been hurt, and work like you aren't getting paid," yeah, that is not as romantic as it sounds at 7:30 pm, with dinner dishes everywhere, kids all over the place, bedtimes looming, rain pouring, toys from one end of the house to the other, and two boys who desperately need to wrestle with their dad and a little girl who is dying for daddy time and a wife who is pregnant and exhausted.  And, it's night #4 in this condition.  

I found myself in Gideon's position.  I wanted to ask for things that in my eyes would be miracles.  We need financial provisions.  I need my sleep and rest to be multiplied.  I need to have breaks from the insanity.  I need the kids to be divinely wonderful to each other.  But, as God gave all of those things, I found it easy to respond like Gideon.  That bill that the insurance picked up, that was their responsibility anyway.  That extra long nap that Trey just had, he must be having a growth spurt.  Silas and Jewel in the sandbox for 2 hours on this gloriously sunny afternoon in October in Oregon...that's a lucky weather day and a major thanks to Jordan for building that sandbox.  Still, God answered those needs.  When I thought I needed to see nature defying miracles, God showed his power.

Then, God gave me a trip into the Midianite camp with a companion.  On October 1st, God sent my cousin Riley and his wife and two kids to stay with us.  Instead of this being a burden or a stress, it was companionship and fun.  Corissa was in the kitchen with me every night, talking and chopping our way through dinner preparations.  Riley took Silas upstairs for some guy time over the lego table.  Jewel took their daughter, Emily (2), under her wing and shared toys and dress up clothes and coloring time.  We made adventures of the days and quality time of the evenings.  When Jordan got home I was excited to see him, but not desperate for him to meet all of my needs (which he was very thankful for after a 14 hour day).  On Friday night, Riley and Corissa insisted that we take a date night and that they hang out with the kids.  What started as a little breathing room for us, turned into a midnight return to a spotless and silent house with hearts FULL from needed connection and conversation...for free.  A sunny Saturday led to the guys being super productive outside.  Riley chopped and chopped and chopped wood for me.  Even though we didn't know that Jordan wouldn't be around the next few evenings to get the wood ready for me, he did it because he loves us.  He did it as an expression of God's love.  Corissa and I had a couple hours to run a few errands on Saturday afternoon.  This week was the first time I have been with her outside the setting of our family reunions in Spokane (that consist of 100's of people).  God filled our hearts with love and appreciation for one another and blessed our conversation to be encouraging and challenging and uplifting.  

As our time with them was wrapping up, I got a phone call from my dad.  He is on fall break in his school district.  He and my mom are road tripping, in the name of looking for a new vehicle, but with the purpose of adventure and excitement.  They announce that on a Spirit led whim they are over half way to our house.  We are giddy.  I set up the pull out couch in the attic.  It's not until they walk through the door late that night that I start to remember Gideon.  There is just nothing in the whole world like getting a smothering hug from my mom and dad.  We spent Sunday morning all together around the table with a huge breakfast and lots of talking.  Riley and Corissa were on their way out that day, we hugged and kissed them goodbye and truly thanked God for sending them to us.  The weather was fantastic.  My parents took us all the the pumpkin patch, we all had long naps, Jordan and my dad had a run together.  That evening we had community group.  We cancelled the sitter we normally pay for and left the kids with my mom and dad.  They went on an adventure to Costco and by the time we got home everyone was in jammies, snuggled on the couch singing songs, and our fridge, freezer, and cupboards were bursting.  On Monday when Jordan went to work, we left my dad and the boys at home to play and went to have girl time.  Jewel had dance class, my mom spoiled me with little things for the kids and the house, and we had a Starbucks date of coffees and hot chocolate.  It was Monday night that Jordan wasn't home until midnight.  But I spent the evening in deep conversation with my mom over a long and delicious meal preparation.  That night at dinner we went around the table to pray and when it was Silas' turn he said "God, thank you for my little sister, Jewel.  I really do love playing with her."  Trey bonded with my parents in the short time they were here, really being his silly self and letting them into his hysterical and mischevious little world.  

Tuesday morning Jordan left for his next assignment at 4:30 am.  My parents left for the continuation of their adventure at 6 am.  I sat at my fire place, fell to my knees and worshipped.  The Lord did meet the needs that I asked for.  Despite late nights and pockets empty of money, I was so full and rested and abundantly provided for.  But, it was the things of my heart that he touched with his mighty power, things I didn't even know to ask for, that brought me to my knees.  

Yes, God's power is limitless and incredible.  Today it is so easy to try to explain away the miracles.  There are so many resources at my finger tips that I often don't ask God for those things, or I just believe that he is providing through practical means.  When God took Gideon down to the camp to show him that he was already accomplishing his promise, that the huge camp of Midianites was fearful of him, that he arrived at the very tent where this conversation was happening, with a trusted companion as a witness, it puts the whole fleece situation to shame!  God is saying, "This is who I am Gideon, and this is how much I love you."  When God sent me companionship, laughter, adventure, and excitement, it puts the whole 'help me survive' request to shame!  Oh Lord, when you use your mighty power in a display for the personal things of my heart, I can only drop to my knees and worship!  

Tuesday night Jordan was home for dinner.  Our company was all gone.  The kids and I about jumped out of our skin when he pulled up.  I had just gotten off the phone with the insurance company and found out that over $500 of medical bills had been submitted incorrectly and we were not responsible for the balance.  We spent the evening playing and laughing and just being together.  Jordan and I stayed up way too late trying to catch up on the last few days, exchanging our exciting stories and oohing and ahhing over God's work.  This morning we both turned off our alarms and slept to the last possible moment.  

“Let the beloved of the Lord rest secure in him,
    for he shields him all day long,
    and the one the Lord loves rests between his shoulders.”


Today we bask in the glory of his power.  Today we take the time to record it and to say thank you again and again.  Today we walk forward in obedience, rejoicing in the tender love of our Father.